We asked our fans on Facebook, “what is the strangest thing you have heard a patient say after waking up from anesthesia?” and the result was hysterical.
We hope you enjoy their answers as much as we did. Share your own anecdotes in the comments!
“This must have been the stuff that killed Elvis.” The patient was referring to the anesthesia meds, while playing with his socks on his hands as puppets. – Stacey F.
“Why is there a pink puppy running around loose in the hospital?” That patient is now my husband. – Jennifer M.
My son looked at me and said “MOM, that nurse is HOT.” She was about 60 years old and he was 13. – Veona A.
I promised to give every worker in the entire GI lab their own cheesecakes, each and every one of them! – Shannon L.
I woke up from my cesarean asking to hold my puppy. They brought my baby to me and I told them it was not mine, convinced I had given birth to a puppy. – Raba A.
“That’s a great salt lick, I want some more!” said a man to his wife, who was giving him ice chips. – Kristina H.
“Can I feel your fake boobs?” Me, to a nurse friend. – Tasha G.
“Where’s my husband? I want a divorce.” – Crystal K.
I worked on the ENT floor with one of the surgeons who was assisting with my ear surgery. When I woke up I told him just how gorgeous he was and that I wanted him. I could never look him in the eyes again! – Lynne H.
My father was singing “Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer” with his finger on his nose… because his O2 sat was making his fingertip glow red! – Nancy M.
Hubby woke up from anesthesia and told me he was late, and that I needed to get him to the rodeo so he could ride. He said he would ride his bull with his broken arm. (he really was a bull rider years earlier) – Cheryl K.
My friend’s father proposed to me after his upper endoscopy… things were a wee bit strange after we told him! He is happily married! – Betsy L.
Apparently I was hitting on my doctor, and I kept taking my pulse ox off and putting it on my mom saying “You need this! You need to wear this, Mom!!” – Allison D.
After a colonoscopy, my friend, a PACU nurse told her patient to pass flatus to which he responded “I can’t, I’ll sh*t the bed!” Apparently he thought it was his wife talking to him and that he was already at home. – Dawn T.
I woke myself up speaking Spanish and asking if I was in Mexico on vacation. Now that I am a nurse tech, I never mistake a hospital for vacation! – Crystal E.
Inappropriate sexual comments are very common… and especially awkward when the family is present! – Laura W.
My husband woke up and he was really worried. He said that his pet monkey had bitten my brother, and that I needed to stop wasting my time looking at him and get over to my brother in the next room to see if he was okay. (My brother was fine. He was 500 miles away. And we did not have a pet monkey!) – Debra D.
“You operated on the wrong knee.” – Sandra M.
“A few years ago I had a 5 year old getting tubes in her ears. We asked patients 3 questions when they woke up: what is the last thing you remember before falling asleep, the first thing you remember after waking, and did you dream? She dreamed. She dreamed that her daddy came to see her. He told her he missed her and that he loved her. Talk about some tearful nurses. We already knew her because her daddy had died at the hospital 2 weeks earlier.”
– Debbie B.
“Pass the cherries.” (not a hint of fruit in the room) – Pia L.
“I’m Michael Jackson.” – Lily F.
“Who the hell are you?” – Cynthia S.
I was in the PACU for observation in nursing school. An elderly woman woke up, pointed to the ceiling and stated, “Look at all those rows of corn. Somebody better pick them, they’re pretty ripe.” Upon the nurse reminding her she was in the hospital she said, “I know I’m in the hospital, but somebody still needs to pick that corn.” – Dawn T.